Today Really Sucks

4 years ago my life was about as normal as everyone else's and that changed all because of a boat accident. That accident changed my life into a roller coaster ride that not only affects me but also my parents, instead of me taking care of them they are now taking care of me and will have to for the rest of my life and that is not what is supposed to happen at all. If only I would have listen to my inner voice not to go but the boys had convinced me to go and they had said that they really wanted me to go, so I went and it really changed my life. I blame Bill for it and he blames me and says that if I was sitting in the seat that I was supposed to be in that I would not be in the chair but if it was meant to happen then it would of happened in the other one also so it is not my fault and I guess that it is not really his fault either. If he would of said that he was sorry that this had happened to me then maybe I would not blame him but he has never said that he was sorry or anything, the only thing that he said to me was that he would not take responsiblitly for the accident and that he would not pay any bills so I better get a job and start saving my money, but he was the one that caused me not to be able to work in the first place and he is not taking responsibility for that either, in 1998 he was taking to work and it ws raining and he had rear ended another car and I was thrown into the windshield and had to have surgery in 2000 for a pinched nerve in my neck from the accident. I had to have my neck fused, because in the accident I had a dislocated vertabra in my neck and they could not fix it and while they were doing the surgery I foumd out that I had congetially fused vertabra and they had to fuse the rest of them to make my neck stable so that is what they did and the end result was that I was not able to move my neck enough to be able to work, cannot drive either because I cannot move my neck up, down,side to side if I have to turn my neck I have to turn my body to look at what is on the side and I have learned to compromise and it has been hard to learn to do that. But I hav eovercame alot int he last few years and I am better for it and I have learned not to take anything for granted and live each and every day to the fullest and stop and listen to music along the way. I just wish that I didn't have to burden on my parents and Mom needs to help me with certain things but she does and that is the what life dealt me and Ihave to live with it and that is what I am trying to but today is really hard but Iam going to get through it and THANK GOD I am.